A day in my life

When I decided to blog, it was mostly so I could print my blog out at the end of the year and have a book of our year, the good, the bad, the fun times and days that I was just glad I made it thru. I miss my mom being here, but the thing lately I wish I had the most was a written account of her struggles. How she made it thru them, did she have bad days? Did she ever want to throw in the towel and say this is too much to handle? Everyone always states the good. I want Hayden to know someday that I had bad days, too. And, that is okay to struggle and be frustrated.

Yesterday was one of those days. It was hectic, painful and frustrating. I left the house early and had a 7am doctors appointment for Ann. From there, we dropped Hayden off at school, I had an emergency retreatment root canal done at 8:30am. It was painful and ever so sore with a terrible infection in my jaw. Boy did I ever hurt. I went in to work for a couple of hours, picked up Hayden from school early and headed up to North Scottsdale for a 3 hour appointment at Melmed Center for Hayden. We met with the psychologist and developmental pediatrician. I was trying my hardest to have a discussion with them about Hayden and what I felt was the best course of treatment for him. I was is SO much pain, had 2 percocets in me and just wanted to fall on the ground and cry.

However, I made it thru the day. I think we accomplished a lot at Melmed yesterday. Although, poor Hayden, more tests are on the way. I feel bad for how much he gets poked at. We are making an appointment to have him start seeing a nuerologist, his has to do more blood work, get his thyroid checked and he is continuing all other treatments. It was traumatic enough on him being in the hospital last week for tests on his kidneys and bladder. That poor little boy, he is just getting it from every angle.

I came home and crashed on the couch. I'm lucky to have two brothers who know so much about medication and how to alter medications to get me out of pain. I actually got the pain to subside enough for me to sleep.

And, although, it was a terrible day, I am thankful for wonderful people in my life that make the trying days bearable. I am thankful for a wonderful husband who would and does do everything possible to make my life better. I am thankful to Ann for driving me all over yesterday, so that I could take pain medicine while having to go so many different places. I'm thankful to Suzi, who did homework with Hayden last night and read with him so that I could lay on the couch. And, I am thankful to Jodi who encourages me and reassures me that I am making good decisions and doing what is best for Hayden.

Most of all, I am thankful that Hayden is in my life. And, although I do get tired of all the tests, appointments, therapy and constantly being at doctors, I am so grateful for each day I get to spend with my amazing little boy. He is the joy of my life. Every time a new doctor sees him, or we get results back, I am so thankful that he is such a miracle and is still here with us.