Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Not as planned....not what is wanted...but we will endure

Hayden's annual cardiologist visit didn't go as planned. I usually go in and sit through the EKG, watch his heart in the Echo Cardiogram and anxiously await the words, "it all looks great". 

This year, those words did not come. Instead, I hear the the aorta and pulmonary arteries and valves look great. I breathe a little easier. Then Dr. J does the physical exam and talks to Hayden. There is concern in his voice. He asks Hayden more questions and asks me about his pain and exertion. 

Dr J is concerned. It is down to three different complications with varying degrees of remedies. 

First and most likely, a wire which tied his sternum together has frayed or come undone. It could be poking into his chest or more serious, puncturing his heart and causing damage. If this is the culprit, heart surgery will be done to remove the wire and re-wire the sternum, if necessary. 

The next most likely culprit, is the coronary arteries are damaged. With his latest growth spurt, the coronary arteries could have ripped or torn or become worn out. This would require major open heart surgery. Artery graphs would have to be done and replace the coronary arteries. A week to two week stay in ICU would be followed by another couple of weeks in the hospital. If this option is the one, my poor boy will spend his birthday and possibly Christmas in the hospital. 

The least likely reasons is scar tissue and the pulling of it wrapped around the sternum. This would require pain meds, physical therapy, some other therapies and medications. 

Of course, other info can come up and other complications. But that is the info we have now. 

As we talked to the doctor, he sent us directly to Scottsdale Shea hospital for X-rays. He then sent an order to be hooked to a holster moniter at Mercy Gilbert Hospital. He order stat metabolic stress tests, MRI, CT scans and said from there, he would decide what is next. 

While at the first hospital, I received a call. The metabolic stress test would require us going to Cali or Las Vegas for the test. So he changed to a regular stress test with a pulmonary test and some other tests. He wanted them done stat. With that, the Holter Monitor was cancelled and rescheduled while he is in the hospital. 

November 20th at 8am, Hayden checks in at the heart hospital at Phoenix Children's Hospital. He will have a treadmill stress test with pulmonary tests. They will preform the MRI and other tests while in the hospital. From there, the decisions will be made on where to head next. 

Needless to say, it has been a stressful day. A scary one for Hayden and an unsettling one for me and Thomas. As I walked in the door, my strength granted to me as a tender mercy by my Savior, my body collapsed into a massive seizure. Luckily Julie called and heard the slurring in my words and the overwhelming confusion. She showed up and sat with Hayden while I was unconscious and out of it. 

I am so grateful for my knowledge of my Savior. I know He will carry Hayden and Thomas and I through whatever course this road turns. He is our strength. We trust Him. We love Him. And we know He will guide the doctors and guide their decisions and their actions. We feel His peace and reassurance. We feel His love. 

I will keep the blog updated as to my sweet boy's progress. He is a trooper. He is willingly doing all the things the doctor has asked him to do in the next few days, with running and trying to recreate issues so we can video tape them. They are starting him on exercises that will help in the event that open heart surgery is needed. He will need to stretch and grow. I'm grateful I am homeschooling and we get the chance to take care of schooling around his health issues. Such a blessing and if it is the wire or coronary arteries, it is one that could have possibly saved his life. How blessed are we for inspiration. How blessed are we that our Savior guides and directs. We feel His power and blessings. 

Surprise visit

Best surprise ever! 

Sunday night as we were chilling on the couch, with Suzi, when the doorbell rang. I hear "surprise!" And little voices that I love. And then I heard my sister. Not only that, they had come for a slumber party. So so sweet. What a wonderful surprise. 

We talked and laughed and the kids played. After everyone went to bed, I hear a little knock on my door. Talmage was holding his big Shamu and Captain Hook. He said, "mommy said I could sleep with you." I knew she hadn't. I figured both she and Brigham had fallen asleep and he came to find us. He climbed into the middle of the bed with his friends. 

Thomas and I laughed that although a king bed is big, it feels rather small with both of us plus Tman plus his 2 stuffed friends and 2 puppies. It was tight quarters but so much fun. We loved sitting and talking to him. He is so funny and his personality is just precious. 

Brooklyn and Hayden hung out and talked on the couches for quite a while. I love the whispering and giggling and how much they have to talk about. 

The morning came with one by one the kids all congregating in our room. I love morning cuddles from these cute kids. 

We had a great day. Jodi and I even got a chance to go to Target without the rug rats. I love that they are getting old enough to leave. It was so fun helping Jodi with her Christmas shopping. We laughed and had a great time. 

The kids went to go get Chad but since he was sleeping, they were thrilled when Katie and Josh said they would go to the path with them. They played and played and then they came back and played Disney Apples to Apples. They had those kids laughing and having the best time. 

I love them living so close and how wonderful they are to our kids. 

Thomas came home and we rounded off the night with FHE and video games ith Thomas, Hayden and Chad. I observe. I hold the pups. I just listen and smile. I love the joy that feels our home. I love the smiles and laughter. I love all of the loved ones that fill our home and hearts wig love and joy. Life is blessed.  

Friday, November 7, 2014

Garage Sale

We again held a huge garage sale today. One day down. One day to go. Today, I tried my best to sit outside and take money while Julie and Hayden ran the garage sale. It was so so busy that they needed my help. But I felt awful. I tried to make it. I tried to help. I tried to clean up afterwards a little. 

I was exhausted. So so so sick!!!  As soon as they loaded the remaining items in the garage, I fought back tears as the pain was so incredibly intense. Julie asked if I wanted to count and settle money. Absolutely not. I just wanted to go home. I was bright red. I was so hot. I was miserably dying. I barely could walk inside as I fought back tears of pain. Each step more painfully excrutiating than the last. By the time I got to my bedroom, tears fell freely. I soaked in a tub of cold water desperately trying to ease the pain and bring my body temperature down. 

I painstakingly made each excrutiating step to my bed. The sheets felt like knives going into my feet and legs. The cramping and thrashing of my leg just tormented me more. I smothered my legs in deep blue. My nerves kept sending shock waves of electricity throughout my body. Pain was so intense that pain killers wouldn't even touch the pain. 

I tried to sleep. I tried to relax. Pain lasted all afternoon and evening. I counted down for Thomas to get home. 

As I lay in bed, I am beginning to care about the total of my day and the profits pulled in. By tomorrow, I am sure I will be ready for the numbers. There is one thing for positive... Thomas and Julie and Hayden will be handling the garage sale without me tomorrow. I will be in bed. 

But I am so grateful for all those that donated. All those that let us have their hand me downs and donation piles. I'm thankful for Julie letting us have the sale at her house and helping out. 

I am surrounded by wonderful people in my life. Just amazing. So many serve us and love us and share with us. We are beyond bless and unbelievably lucky!

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Halloween week

Halloween came and went. We didn't hardly even celebrate or do most of our traditions. However, Hayden survived. He did other things instead and it was a good month. 

Josh took Chad, Hayden, Kaylee and Kiley to Fear Farm. There are five different haunted houses in one. The entire place is spookily decorated and filled with goblins and ghouls, zombies and werewolves, vampires and clowns. Hayden had a wonderful time with his cousins. He was in Heaven. 

We decorated scary bottles and jars and had a great time. Hayden had so much fun decorating and designing his scary scene, complete with a painted Frankenstein. He loved creating potions and jars with spiders and scary toenails. He has an artists eye and is a great designer. 

Halloween night didn't go exactly as planned. Poor Hayden. His plans fell thru. He was ditched by friends. My heart broke as I remembered similar feelings from my teen and preteen years. As a momma, I want to protect him from heartache but my job is to teach him to handle it not to avoid it. 

We had fun! Grandma Julie came thru and brought over her portable fire pit. We roasted hot dogs and made s'mores as we handed out candy to trick or treaters. It was so hot. So we had to pretend it was cool enough for a fire. We had fun! 

When I pulled out the treats for the trick or treaters, Hayden was in disgust at what we bought. Thomas and I had been to Michaels and had bought erasers and fangs. We bought 250 for under $2. That's what you get the night before Halloween. Hooray. Hayden did NOT think that was a good treat. He found treats that Suzi had bought and pulled those out. So luckily we had small kit kits and nerds that Suzi had bought Hayden. The kids loved the erasers. Hayden's response was, "why would girls want school supplies?" I guess owls and bats and rip graves are not his thing. The boys loved the fangs. 

After the trick or treaters, the boys played video games. I loved to hear him laugh as it was a sad weekend for him. 

Saturday morning he was so sweet. He told me that he was glad he had a fun dad because his dad is always there to step in and be his friend. He asked if there would be fun Halloweens again. I said yes. Just different. Things change but you find new fun in different ways. 

Of course, with his disappointment, Thomas tried really hard to help ease some of his first preteen angst by going to the movies and playing games with his Bubba that night. So October came and went with new experiences, disappointments overcome, fun moments and lots of love. 

I love that no matter what comes and goes and happens in life that my dear husband and my precious son get to experience it with me. Together. All on the same team. There for one another. Ready to face whatever challenges and obstacles and wonderful things that come our way! 

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Not Again

Yep. Regardless of how I would like life to go, I'm lucky to always get to experience the 1% chance. 99% chance will be ok....I must worry. Although I guess the reverse is true, as well. I should have died but yet I defy the odds. 

This time it is not fun. I've now had three intestinal blockages or obstructions in the past month. I can't get rid of them. Oh man do they hurt like crazy. The symptom list includes intense and unbearable pain. Yep. Great explanation along with nausea and vomiting and doubling into a ball. And it should include a trip to the ER. However, been there, done that. Miserable. A week with no food or water, hooked to iv's, getting CT scans every day and ultra sounds.  Um. I pass. 

I'm grateful for priesthood blessings that confirm my suspicions so I know what I am dealing with. I know how to out myself on an all liquid diet. And I'd rather lay doubled in a ball in my bed or on my,couch than anywhere else....especially a hospital bed. 

No wonder I haven't been able to eat anything or keep anything down. I have zero appetite. I am hurting beyond compare. 

I am also grateful for priesthood blessings that promise comfort and peace and endurance. For peace to know that if I follow guidelines at home, I will survive and be ok. Even when it's 3:30am and I have not yet been to sleep because of unbearable pain and spending most of the night on the bathroom floor. 

I've had this before and barely escaped the condition prior to surgery.  I am praying for that type of miracle again. Why do I share? I know that everyone has prayed and prayed and fasted and been there for me. I feel your prayers. I feel your strength as I pass through these hard trials. The pain is eased as I rely on my Savior and feel the added protection and comfort from the prayers of so many loves ones and dear friends. I feel the strength and prayers of my ward family and total strangers. 

I am so grateful for the priesthood and the power of healing it brings. I'm praying for yet another blessing of healing in my,life. That through our collective prayers that I may be healed and may go on again. I'd appreciate any prayers that you could offer up in my behalf. I'm a firm believer in prayer and the Savior hearing our petitions. He answers in His own way and in. His own timing. I'm praying this is short lived and may pass quickly. Your prayers, as always, are very very appreciated. Hugs to all of you, my dear friends!

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Garage sale

Getting ready for a garage sale is a TON of work. 

I have been pricing clothes and toys and home goods. I'm praying for a good turn out and lots of buyers. I'm so grateful for all that has been donated. If anyone has anything lying around you are wanting to get rid of, and you are close by, we will come pick it up. 

Will Rogers is having their annual neighborhood garage sale a week from Saturday, Nov 5th and 6th, I believe. Come. There should be lots of good stuff. We have a ton of clothing. Tons and tons. Lots of home goods. Video games. Mega blocks. Toys. Furniture. Antiques. And more. 

We moved most of the items to Julie's house. Our garage is looking so so good. It's so nice. Heavenly. I love being organized. Kudos to my husband and son and Chad for lots and lots and lots of hours of hard work to get it organized. We have more to oh but it's heavenly. 


Suzi asked of Thomas would come help put up her tv. She said in exchange she would give us some items to sell at the garage sale. Oh wow did she. Bags and bags of clothes. Many pairs of Miss Me and LA Idol Jeans. Baby Nike's and lots of clothes. 

When we got to her house, she also took us out to breakfast. If you live in Gilbert or Queen Creek the Egg and I is delicious. So so yummy. Whole wheat waffles were amazing.  Yummy!!!!

While at the restaurant, Suzi ran out for a minute. She came back with a prepaid appointment for me to get my hair done. I told her no. Too much money and asked her if she would just dye the roots if it was that bad. Well, I guess it was awful because the hairdresser asked if I had my hair dyed in less than a year. Ummm. No. It just wasn't a priority. I'm sure it looked awful but honestly, where do I go? The lady who did it was amazing. Suzi told her she needed to do it as fast as possible. I e never seen someone wrap foils so fast. And my hair set up in minutes. I was in and out in less than an hour and a half. And it looks and feels great. 

We also raided Suzi's food stash she was getting rid of. She was going to take her out dated food the the food bank. I looked up shelf life of items and we were able to utilize quite a bit. Even a case of green beans and a case of canned corn and a case of peas. The case of fruit didn't work as it was bulging and had exploded inside. Oops. That made a little bit of a mess. 

Needless to say, we scored big time! Breakfast, hair highlighted and cut, pantry items and tons of items for sale. Probably 10 garbage sacks full. Needless to say, it was a great score of a day. Thanks, Suzi for the fun and special treatment. I felt so good getting my hair done. Exhausted but happy!!!