Sacred Temple Experience

What a beautiful and long awaited day I was blessed with yesterday. Julie made the decision to go thru the temple and make sacred covenants with our Savior. My heart cannot express the joy that has overcome me for the peace and understanding that her choice has brought her. She has spent a lot of time coming to this decision. My heart is so happy for her.

With the way I have been feeling, I was trying to figure out a way possible be there for her on this sacred and special day. My heart desired to support her, be with her and let her know how much I care. However, when the spirit is willing, sometimes the body is weak, and endurance is just not possible.

Jodi picked me up and went with me to meet Thomas at the temple. Thomas and I were going to participate in sealings and meet up with Julie at the end. As the day went on, my prayers and pleading with my Father in Heaven, became more fervent. I really wanted to experience this with her.

As I walked into the temple, I pleaded with the Father for added strength to be able to go thru a session. I said a silent prayer and asked that I be able to have the strength to walk thru the next couple of hours.

Peace came over me and I decided to have the faith to walk thru the session. As I walked in, ward members were all shocked to see me. Honestly, I do not have the strength to sit thru three hours of church, much less handle a session in the temple. But my faith was strong.

As I sat next to Jodi, I about had a panic attack. What was I doing? My strength was gone and I had only rode the elevator up one floor. I took a couple of deep breaths and prayed or pleaded for strength. I prayed for the Savior to take over and make up for my lack of strength.

Half way thru, I was in big trouble. I was white as a ghost and had no strength to move. I struggled just to not pass out. I spent the entire time pleading for help. So many tender mercies occurred while I was in that session. When things became rather dire, I let my head drop and put it in the Lord's hand. I knew I was passing out. I know the symptoms. I have never gone that far into the process without going out.

As I lifted my head, Jodi looked at me and told me that I looked like a different person. My Savior let me walk until just before my strength completely gave out and then He stepped in.

I trusted him and he didn't disappoint me. He did just as I expected and had asked. He knew how important this event was for Julie. He knew how important it was for her for me to be there. He wanted to make the day perfect and special for her. He wanted her to know that he knows her, he is aware of her, he knows the true desires of her heart, he walks with her and he has the power to do the impossible.

Once again, he taught me.

I learned so much in those moments. I was required to walk in faith and into the darkness before I was strengthened. The Lord pushes me farther and I must walk longer in faith than I have before. However, he always comes. The darkness always turns to light and he comes.

I will never forget walking in and seeing Julie. Hugging her in the temple was a beautiful experience. I want so deeply for her to be happy. I want her to experience all the love and joy and peace and happiness that The Lord has to offer.

The Lord has promised us that all he has is ours if we will just come unto him.

I have tasted the sweet peace and joy of following the Savior. It is desirous beyond any other joy that life has to offer. When I saw Julie, her face was glowing. She was filled with peace and the happiness that only comes from the Savior.

I am so grateful for the opportunity I had to spend those precious moments in the temple. The sweet moments spent with my friends and family that I love dearly, was so uplifting. Seeing Julie there touched my heart. Being strengthened by the Savior and having my prayers and deepest desires of my heart answered again, absolutely priceless.

My heart is so full! My Savior knows me and has again answered my prayers. He loves me enough to fulfill the deepest desires of my heart. And although I cannot do much, when the stakes are high and the deepest desires of my heart need to be met, my Savior strengthens me to do what is needed. He takes over when the frailties of my body are too weak to do what is wanted and needed. I am so grateful to him. He loves me, he knows me and I am his.

Talmage and the Temple

Jodi took me to Seagull book earlier today to get me out of the house. I had a great time just talking to Jodi and the sun beating down on us as we drove the car. I walked around Seagull book and found a great new book to read. And the perfect gift for a friend.

When we walked outside to the car, Talmage spotted the temple. He kept saying, "I want to go to the temple. I want to see Jesus." Jodi drove him around the entire temple, but that was not enough. When he realized she was leaving without him getting to go in, he had a complete and utter meltdown with gator sized tears.

He kept saying over and over, "But I want to see Jesus. I want to go inside the temple. I want to play with Jesus."

Jodi pulled into the parking lot and looked over at me and knew I would never make it. I was exhausted. I looked back at Talmage and he was just begging to go inside and see Jesus. How do you deny that sweet and tender request?

I said a silent prayer. I knew how important this was for Talmage. As I stepped out of the car, the strength to walk came. As I walked into the visitor's center, the pain left my body. My prayer was answered and I was given the strength so Talmage could have his sweet tender heart renewed.

Talmage walked over to Jesus, and Jodi lovingly talked to him about Jesus and the nail prints. He stood for a minute but he didn't want the statue, he wanted to see his Savior and friend. He missed him so much and was aching for that sweet reunion.

Talmage started running from room to room, opening each door, walking in, looking around and could not find the Savior. When he made it to the back of the visitor's center, he looked outside and saw the temple. He raced outside, pointing and saying, "I want to go in there. That is where Jesus is."

Jodi took him outside and loving taught him about the temple. She taught him about how that the special feeling he was feeling was the Holy Ghost, he had found Jesus in his heart. She taught that while on this earth we feel Jesus with our hearts on the inside and do not get to see him with our eyes.

Talmage was happy. He felt his Savior. And although he didn't understand and was disappointed that he didn't get to run into our Savior's arms, he did feel him.

As Jodi told him it was time to go, he sweetly asked if we could go get Brooklyn, Brigham and Hayden and come back. He wanted them to all experience the love and tenderness and spirit that he had felt while in the temple visitor center.

I have spent so much time thinking about those precious few moments. My little three year old nephew taught me some valuable lessons. I should spend my life searching, really searching to find my Savior, to follow him and do all I can to be with him and have his spirit with me.

Sweet Talmage, I love that you remember and know who you are, which is a son of God. Jesus is indeed your older brother, your friend and Savior. He loves us all. You taught your Aunt Jer so much because of your great desire to see Jesus. Nothing should stop us from seeking him. We should also take every opportunity to spend time with him. There is definitely nothing more important that that. Thank you for the sweet reminder. I love you buddy!

Jodi, if you ever doubt you are a good mom, remember this moment. You stopped what you had planned to help your sweet son search for his Savior, older brother and friend. When it all comes down to it in life, what else matters. As I listened to you teach Talmage today, I was in awe of you and the incredible mother that you are to your children. They are each lucky to have you. What a precious moment for all of us.