The first week without Thomas there made me nervous. I rely so heavily on my husband and his ability to call down the powers of Heaven whenever there is a need.
But as the days grew closer and I grew stronger, the excitement inside me grew. I was so ready for a break. An escape. Oh how my heart longed for the cool breeze, the sound of crashing waves, the laughter of cousins, the sounds of my brothers teasing and the peace that comes with my annual "walk with my mom".
The night before I left, Thomas offered a beautiful blessing. My Savior and Father in Heaven reassured me that I would be watched over and protected while away from home. They would take care of me. I had no need to fear. I felt utter peace. I felt a calm wash over me. I felt so loved.
In the blessing, I was told that Q96 would begin to heal my body. Heal. Healing. Words I have longed to hear for over 3 years. Did I hear that correctly? Heal. Healing to me is so much. There is healing in emotional ways. Acceptance. Peace. There is healing physically. There is healing the place that no longer was free to hope. There was freeing peace that came over. It felt like I would heal in all ways. Healing that is complete and perfect and only comes from the One on High.
I felt so many emotions. It's as if he flood gates opened wide and feelings and thoughts and emotions poured in like a broken dam. Hope. Love. Joy. Eager anticipation. Wonder. Excitement. Healing. Health. Love. All encompassed my mind. I felt free. No longer confined to a workless and ill body. No longer the captivity that has had hold on my body for so long.
It was a beautiful feeling. A treasured moment and a gracious gift.
I slept in peace knowing my husband may not be taking this journey with me but my older brother, My Savior, Christ would walk with me. He would protect me and care for me. I had no need to fear. I slept in utter peace. Ready to embark on another new journey.
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