I know I am who I am because I had her for a dear mother. I also know her death and having to grow up quickly had a huge impact on who I am. I gained strength. I learned to rely on my Savior. I learned to trust myself. I learned to rely on what I had learned and strength beyond my own.
This year I awoke to a beautiful text from my brother, Josh. He said he was remembering mom and how lucky we were to all have her in our lives.
I responded with a note to each of my brothers individually and my sister. I wrote them how I felt my mom sees them today and tried to note the things she would admire and be proud of them for. I tried to see each of them as my mom and our Savior sees them.
When I looked at each of them from that perspective, I was amazed at the incredible people I saw. I saw leaders, great parents, loyal spouses, true disciples of our Savior and people who love and care about those around them. As I expressed my joy and love of each of them, my love for each one grew. My admiration at each of them and their lives, brought added love and even more respect and feelings of gratitude.
Lucky for me, each responded with gentle words of kindness and respect and love back. The notes will be ones I always cherish.
Josh expressed his love for me. That mom is proud of me. That he would do anything for me.
Jake expressed his love for me as a sister and friend. I told me of the example I was to him. He told me that he has always strived to be more like me as he has lived his life. I expressed his desire for me to get better and have great times again like before I got sick. Swimming, BBQ's and playing cards are all missed. He expressed he loved me more than the world.
JD was touched by my text. He expressed feeling mom close and how much she loves and misses each of us. He said that my loving ways, kindness and consideration were qualities from mom. Of course expressed his love for me and gratitude for me being his sister.
Jodi, of course, took me to breakfast and we talked and shared stories and all the things that best friends and sisters do. She has my back like almost no one else. Her constant support and sacrifice for me is inexpressible.
The messages touched my heart. They made my day. They caused me to really sit and evaluate the quality and impact of one life. I am so grateful that I was chosen to be apart of this family. That I was lucky enough to be chosen as the eldest sibling to these incredible people. They have each touched my heart in very unique and special ways.
I am grateful for a mom that taught me to love. That encouraged us siblings to be close and develop relationships with one another. For a father that kept traditions and took us on trips together and did all he could to help us to build everlasting relationships and friendships. That knew we would need each other long after he and my mom left this earth.
Happy birthday, Mom! You are loved and missed more than you could ever imagine. I am grateful to be your daughter and have the privilege to be apart of the Simonton family. Thank you for showing me the way to be sick. For teaching me endurance and perseverance, patience in trials, enduring to the end, trusting the Savior and so many more important truths.
Most of all, because I have had to live without you. Thank you for encouraging me to hold,on and fight and continue to live.
I am so very grateful!
No comments:
Post a Comment