We have to have Hayden's cardiac heart surgery scheduled ASAP. We must contact Mayo Clinic to schedule another EMG testing (painful and miserable for me), a tilt table test (that a less it I possible for me to walk for over a week), run automatic sweating and breathing tests along with movement disorder testing. All miserable. All painful. All just annoyingly miserable.
But, without it, no possibility of disability approval. So I will be their monkey or Guinnea pig, and endure the miserable and debilitating testing.
I will try to figure out our rights and find all correspondence to see what we can do to fight our fate. It's a long shot but I pray somehow we can pull a miracle off and keep the ability to at least provide the basic necessities for our family.
There are days it feels like I might just collapse from the stress and magnitude of trials we are asked to endure. When I feel I cannot walk one more step, my loving Savior sends a tender mercy. He sends a sign or a glimmer of hope or act of generosity or kindness or love. And I know that no matter how bad it gets, we are not alone. We walk with diety. We have divine help. We have one on high who loves us perfectly even in our imperfections.
Today the peace came in a question from Hayden. He asked about bankruptcy and I explained it was utilized since the time our Savior walked this earth. It was the year of Jubilee. When all debts prior to seven years were forgiven. A kindness and a tender mercy. Showing us that The Lord didn't want us or Need us to suffer for something we couldn't help. We are forgiven. A gift. On the seventh day we are able to rest from our labor and worldly problems. On the seventh year, we are given relief from debts and worldly monetary issues. I realized that just like the atonement, my Savior already planned a way for us to escape this medical and financial nightmare. I felt His love. I felt His mercy. I felt His tenderness. And I knew no matter what the world throws at us, we walk with the Savior.