Lately, I have felt the sting of downward progress. I feel my lungs beginning to close up again. I am starting to suffer with blood clots more frequently. The intensity of the seizures are coming back. And the loss of consciousness is begin to be a routine again. I battle being able to keep any food down and medications. I feel I live in the bathroom. It's not fun spiraling into the depths of deeper illness.
As I have been praying what to do and where to go for help. What should we try? What should we do? Who can help?
I'm not sure of the answers as we are still in the praying and humbling ourselves for help stage. We are exploring options and calling in doctors. Trying to find any help or hope while keeping the Q96 going for as much help as possible.
Lately, I feel I may need another transplant. A month ago, there is no way. I would not have done it. Too painful. Too scary. They make me so sick. I fight for my life. I brush death. I hit coma stats. They struggle to find veins and get iv's in. It hurts. I'm so sick. I battle to just stay in be and get to the bathroom. Oh how they are miserable. However, I swore after the first one, I would never endure another. I said that again after the second. Her I contemplate a third.
As I feel myself slipping and praying. A transplant enters my mind. Then why is it so difficult for me to call the doctor? One, the doctor battle continues as they wonder why I keep fighting to live. They are unclear of why anyone would choose to prolong such a painful and horrible life. Then comes the insurance battle. Only if I am within a month of death will they spend the money on such an expensive procedure. If I meet these criteria then comes the emotional roller-coaster I face while trying to muster strength for the ordeal.
However. First transplant I almost died. I did. But came back. I fought coma and misery. Sickness that I had never experienced before and brushed death for months as I battled meningitis and pneumonia, severe pain and exhaustion. The second was better. I had help from Dr Shiflet and all natural remedies to ease my body thru. This time, if it works out, I will probably fare even better. I have Dr Shiflet, all natural remedies and Q96. When they wipe my immune system, I will have the building blocks to put it back together. I am hopeful.
So I begin the journey again. One of paperwork and doctors and insurance battles and deductibles. And try to plead with my Savior and Father I. Heaven for direction and help. I will plead with them to spare my life. To help me to overcome. And to help me to beat this.
Prayers would be appreciated as we walk this road to figure out what my Savior has in store for me. I am grateful for so many who help me and make my life better. I believe in the power of prayer. I have been the recipient so many times.
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