Time to Go

The excitement in the air grew as we got ready and hit the airport for our adventures at sea. Hayden was filled with excitement and anticipation. He chatted endlessly about who he would sit by on the plane, talked of the adventures he hoped that would be had, and grew increasingly thrilled with the realization of getting to spend 10 days with cousins and 7 glorious days on the biggest cruise ship on the seas. He was downright giddy.

As happy as I was to be with my extended family for an entire week, my nerves increased the closer to the time we left and the ride to the airport was absolutely brutal. I was hopeful and terrified, nervous and excited, apprehensive and filled with joy. Most of all, I spent the entire week prior to the trip and the entire ride to the airport in prayer. Pleading to know if I would survive the trip. Pleading for the help to endure the long day of travel followed by time away from my safety of home and far from doctors or help if anything were to go really wrong. I seriously considered foregoing the trip, as I knew without divine intervention, there was absolutely no way for me to survive such exhausting conditions.

When we arrived at the airport, I thought for sure we would be there alone. Within minutes of us dropping off our bags, I was embraced in a huge hug from my little buddy, Talmage. It is amazing how magical his hugs are. In that one instance, it was if all the fear and foreboding of disaster swept from my body. A peace descended on me. I felt a surge of love as he wrapped me in his love. I know in that moment, it was a gift from my Savior, promising me that just like Talmage, he would be at my side.

As we lovingly embraced one another, more and more family arrived. We took turns hugging all of Jodi's family, followed by Josh's and then Jake's.

As we sat in the line to board, I looked around. I did all I could to fight back tears. I watched as Josh and Thomas talked and Jake bought strawberry lemonades for the kiddos. Jodi went back and forth between Josh and Jake excitedly talking of the joy soon to be found ahead. I looked to the other side of me where cousin groups had formed. Kaylee with Talmage and Brinley and Austin with Brigham and Casen while Hayden, Brooklyn, Kiley, Katelyn and Braden all discussed music and the fun teen club. My heart melted. The Savior was right. This was exactly what I needed. My heart had taken about all it could. Then, I was given a gift. A reminder. A break from reality and a chance to remember why I am here. Family.

The world began with a small family of two in the Garden of Eden. Family was so important that Eve was willing to sacrifice and trade her easiness and joyful life for one filled with pain and trials, because family was of utmost importance to His plan.

Then I recalled the Savior of the world, born here, perfect yet required to suffer unfathomable heartache and pain and trials and the literally weight of the world. Why? Because he was willing to lay down his life and sacrifice it for family, his brothers and sisters. He was willing to give his life, his all. And our loving Father in Heaven allowed his perfect son to be tormented and crucified and suffer all the sins of the world, because he loved all of his children so much. Family is why he sacrificed.

As I boarded the plane, I no longer felt the need to just cling to Thomas and spend the long day in just prayer. As this little guy again looked at me with those pleading eyes and said in his sweetest and most excited voice, "Sit by me, Aunt Jer!", my heart softened, my mind calmed, and I knew that no matter what the week held ahead of me, I would be protected because my loving Father in Heaven and my Savior understood the utmost importance of family. And they knew how very much I needed this time with mine.