My boys

With how much time I have had the privilege to spend with Jodi's boys, I consider all three of these, mine.

The day after Hayden got home from his field trip, I let him stay home from school. Why not? Less than a week left. They were only finishing up last minute assignments. Hayden was caught up. He was exhausted from no sleep for two nights with constantly going. Plus, I missed him.

Jodi had to run somewhere so she asked Hayden to babysit Talmage. He did a GREAT job! He played and played with Talmage. He made T man lunch. He watched movies with him. He even laid by him on my bed while I slept and rubbed Talmage's back so he would fall asleep.

Hayden is definitely growing up and is becoming more nurturing all the time. He loves Brigham and Talmage and is really trying to be a great example to them. I love that they are starting to look up to him and realizes he will be good to them.

With Hayden being an only child, I worry so much about him. I would give anything for him to have siblings. I did my best and it just didn't happen. One of the greatest gifts is that he has Jodi's kids. They are as close to siblings as he will ever know. I pray that they always include him and let him be apart of their lives as they grow. He loves them. So it touches my heart when I see them all so completely getting along and loving being together.

This one is definitely going on my wall. I love how sweet they are to one another. They had a ton of fun playing together.

When Brigham got home from school, he immediately started in on the fun, too. The boys wrestled, laughed, goofed off and had the best time.

I dreamed of the day when the fighting would be less then the getting along. We have finally hit that swing. They definitely play together and enjoy one another more than they fight. What a blessing. I love the smiles on their faces, even though they are blurred by the camera. I love all three of my boys.

Fathers and sons marathon

Hayden had one of the best weekends of his life. It started on Thursday evening when he and his dad went to the Iron-man 3 premiere. To say he was excited was a complete understatement. From the second he got home from school, he was jumping up and down and waiting outside for his dad to come home from work.

According to Hayden, Ironman 3 was AWESOME!!!

Since they arrived home so late during the night, I let him have a ditch day from school. He was in heaven. Thomas took a half day and picked him up a little after noon to head out for Fathers and Sons camp out up in Pine, Arizona.

Boy was a huge smile stretched across Hayden's face. He was giggly and hyper and a happy boy as he rode off in the car headed for the camp out with his dad.



Unfortunately, we packed based on past fathers and sons outings and failed to look at the current weather conditions. Oops. The boys were so cold. They enjoyed spending time with all, the men and boys in our ward. The boys ran around and played games while the men sat around the campfire and talked.

Hayden was so funny relaying some of the funny moments. My favorite was him talking about the sword fights they had. He said that one of the boys took the Nerf Axe and chucked it at his head. After having a swollen lip, he gathered the swords and with his witty little sarcasm said, "And on that note, I think we are done playing with swords. I'll have to remember that for the future. Nerf axes and father and sons camp outs do not mix." I laughed so hard as I think those words have come out of my mouth.

As the night went on, the colder the guys became. Luckily they chose to sleep in the car with a lot of blanket layers. They were so cold by morning that Hayden wouldn't get out of the car. Instead of hanging around they decided to do their own thing. They headed down the mountain and went out to breakfast in Payson.

On the way home, Thomas drove Hayden to Golfland so he could attend Gunter's birthday party. He had a blast partying with his friends.

Needless to say, when Thomas picked him up on Saturday evening, my boy was exhausted. Happy, full of life and stories but so tired.

He is such a great boy and deserved a great weekend! Hayden is so fun to be around. He is enthusiastic and loves life.

Thomas said the best part of the entire weekend was when Hayden whispered, "Dad, I am glad we are buds. I have a lot of fun when we are together." I sure hope they always enjoy each other and have a lot of weekend adventures together.

iPhone recap

Life via iPhone is so fun! I love having a camera on my phone to capture the world thru my eyes. I love the precious moments that I get to capture.

We have had so many fun little moments lately, that I love.

We were teasing Hayden the other day about how long his hair was getting. He told me when he could successfully put it in a mohawk, that it was time. He laughed and laughed when we easily got it to stick up far and told him it was actually too long for a mohawk.

Hayden is so excited for Monsters University to come out, and so am I. We went and saw The Croods last weekend and loved this cute display. The Croods was a great movie!

We are excited for all the great movies coming out this summer. I am excited for Despicable Me 2, while Hayden is also excited for Cloudy with the Chance of Meatballs 2. Me, not so much!

Jodi's munchkins came over last Saturday night for some cousin bonding time. The played and played outside on the swinging bench and the baby teeter totter. Too funny!

When Jodi came to pick up her kiddos, we were all outside on the porch swing talking and laughing. She sat and talked with us for at least an hour. I love Arizona springtime evenings. They are heaven on earth.

Thomas and Talmage were playing Nerf wars while we were outside. Boy does Talmage ever love his Uncle Thomas. They are the best of buddies. That boy adores me but only if Thomas is no where in sight.

Of course, there is never a weekend at our house where legos are not involved. Hayden is venturing away from the big sets and creating pretty cool inventions on his own. His latest goal in life is to become a lego design engineer. He definitely thinks that is the coolest job in the world. Bye bye heart surgeon, hello full time lego designer.

The kids spend so much time outside on the swing. I am hoping for a lot more beautiful Spring evenings before the dreaded Summer heat kicks in.

Jodi's boys tackle her, or anyone else, that lays on the ground. The want to tackle and wrestle and jump on you. I loved sitting and laughing as the boys totally took her out. In the end she got some great cuddles, but she definitely had to work for them.

With all the great garage sale donations, some of the nicer items we decided to take a stab at selling on Ebay. All I can say is that is a lot of work. We definitely made a little more than we would have if we would have sold the items at the garage sale but holy cow is shipping a lot of money.

Jodi took me to her house the other day so she could get caught up on folding laundry. She laid down on the ground for a minute for a little snooze. Talmage jumped down off the couch and started covering his mom up with the clean clothes from the basket. After he put on each article of clothing, he would tuck it in just right and pat her. She didn't get her nap but boy was it the sweetest little gesture that I witnessed. He sure loves his momma.

Along with his sweetness, he definitely is feisty and has a stubborn streak. He was laughing so hard because I was trying to get him to do something and he thought he was so funny that he wouldn't cooperate. Man do I love this kid.

Hayden had an entire posse of neighborhood boys at our house today. They played water gun wars on the trampoline, had sword fights, played Nerf gun wars, rode bikes, went swimming at Jackson's, came back for $5 Little Ceasar pizza night here and rounded off the evening at about 8 pm, after another all neighborhood Nerf gun wars outside. Best. Night. Ever. according to all the boys involved. I sure love these little punks. They are the sweetest boys ever.

Life is an adventure but I love it! I love that I can at least walk outside to take a picture, even if I was still in my pajamas today at 5pm. Life. is. Good!

Proud parenting moment

Hayden came home from school yesterday with a tear stained face. I knew something was terribly wrong but wasn't sure of the details of the problems. Hayden's first sentence out of his mouth was, "Mom, when dad gets home today, can he give me a priesthood blessing."

He went on to explain the problems and anxiety causing situations at school. Why he was afraid and what could we do to help him. I listened intently knowing that this was a real crisis for him, not just a bad day.

As I took my son in my arms and hugged him, I reassured him that yes, his parents would help him out and help to rectify the situation. I told him how proud I was of him for coming to us to help him with the situation. Even more so, I was so proud of him that he knew where the greatest source for peace, understanding, guidance and help would come from, his Father in Heaven and his older brother, Jesus Christ.

As I hugged him, he took a big sigh of relief, he was unsure as to the outcome of the situation, but he trusted that between his Heavenly Father and his earthly parents, we would help to show him the way to handle the problems that he faces.

Later that evening, when Thomas came home, Hayden and I laid out the problems and situations going on at school, then Hayden ever so tenderly again asked, "Dad, I know that I will feel a lot better if you just give me a priesthood blessing." He continued with, "I need my Heavenly Father's help to understand what to do and to help me not to be afraid and scared."

My sweet husband took our son in his arms, hugged him and offered a beautiful priesthood blessing.

The look on Hayden's face when the prayer was over was one of contentment, peace, relaxation and trust.

Hayden knew that he was given the answers in how to handle the situation. More importantly, he was reassured, by the power of the Holy Ghost, that he was a Son of God. That his worth was is great. His Father in Heaven was proud of who he is, what he does and the valiant spirit that he is developing. He was reassured that he would be given the strength and added ability to handle the situation. He is loved. He is surrounded by people who love him. And that through his goodness and love he would bring many to the Savior and teach them the ways of our Lord.

My boy. He has such a beautiful spirit. His spirit is so much stronger than the mere mortal body that houses his spirit. I was again reminded that Hayden will do great things on this earth. That there is a very special mission set in place for his life.

I love that he asked for a priesthood blessing. I think that he needed to know who he is in the eyes of the Savior. I think as his mom, I needed the reassurance that although I fall short in so many areas, that Hayden is learning what he needs to and developing the skills that our Father in Heaven deems important. He stood up from the blessing with added courage, added strength, add resolve and added knowledge to do what needs to be done.

I needed the sweet reminder yesterday of the love our Father in Heaven has for each of his sons and daughters. We have a divine mission and purpose for walking this earth. I was gently reassured that he knows each of us personally. Our situation. Our strengths and weakness. Our heartaches. Our shortcomings. Our needs. Our desires. Our good points. Thank you my sweet son for the kind and tender reminder that there is one who knows the way out of each situation, that knows the answers, that knows how to fix any ailment or problem that we face.

I love my son and his faith. I love that my husband honors his priesthood and is worthy to lay his hands on Hayden's head and call down the powers of heaven to help Hayden. I am grateful for a Heavenly Father that shows mercy and love to each of us. That he takes the time in each of our situations to reassure us that we are his and if we ask, he will always guide us and walk with us and help us find solutions to all of life's challenges.

Ditch day

Whether Hayden was needing a ditch day or I was needing Hayden to have a ditch day is debatable. Regardless, I let him stay home from school for some mom and son bonding time.

We watched movies, played games, talked, watched mormon channel messages, took a long nap, ate treats and cuddled on the couch.

There is nothing that makes my heart as happy as precious time spent with Hayden really connecting and talking and bonding.

He loved this precious day as much as I did.

We really talked. He asked questions I believe he had tried to get the nerve up to ask of a long time. He asked how close I came to dying. He communicated of his fears during this past two years and the moments he was comforted by the Holy Ghost. He spoke of his own miracles, answers, comforting moments and lessons learned. He was the teacher and I the student.

We cuddled. I spoke of miracles I was blessed with. I spoke of the peace that the Holy Ghost brought when I wasn't sure of the outcomes, the faith required to walk this road and the strength and hope Hayden always brought.

We played games. We laughed. We talked of school and the courage he has to walk his days. The example he is to so many. My hopes and dreams for his future. The qualities that he has and who he is in the Lord's eyes.

It was a great bonding moment. I realized how much my boy has matured and grown up in the past year. He has been strengthened and taught, just as I have. Remarkably, he is so much stronger and has gained so much as he has learned to rely on his Savior and friend for comfort, reassurance and peace.

I am so lucky to be Hayden's mom. I am in awe that The Lord chose me to be this amazing boy's mom. He has so much potential. He is going to do great things in this life. He will bring many people to our Savior. He will stand up for the right.

The responsibility and weight of training him to be the man that he is destined to become has been impressed upon my mind. I have been rededicated to doing all I can to help shape him into the man that he was born to be. To really partner with Thomas and our Savior in being the best parent I can be. To try harder and be a better mom.

It was exactly what I needed. My boy strengthened me and lifted me up. He helped me to reach deep inside and find the strength to try harder, be better and love more. He is one great kid!

Fun Run

Hayden participated in his school's fun run. He was great about getting pledges and determined to raise as much money as possible for his class. He had a goal of 26 laps and man alive he ran 27.

I am so proud of this boy of mine for setting a really hard goal and then pushing hard to not only meet it but exceed it.

It wasn't easy for him. It was a really hot day and he was miserably hot, thirsty, tired and had cramps. However, he persevered and pushed through the discomfort and kept going.

He and Gunter had a great time and cheered each other on.

I love that Hayden stuck to the goal he had and when he reached it, found the strength to do just a little more. Oh how I hope that this sticks with him in all that he does. If I can get him to reach his goals and stretch just a little more, he will move mountains. 

After a water jug was poured over his head he felt much better.

Goal accomplished. Refreshing water. Popsicle. Great friends. Half day of school. What a great day!

Family Night

Hayden came home from school and had a "psychic" vision. His vision was that we were headed out of town this weekend to go to Disneyland. I told him his psychic visions were about as good at Shawn Spencer's. That was about as far from the events happening as could be unless he considered a weekend in pajamas, with yummy cinnamon rolls, listening to General Conference, eating treats and delicious food a "staycation".

We all laughed. He then asked about going to the movies. He wanted to see G.I. Joe. Would his psychic vision be accurate if we were to go on a school night?

His Dad laughed and said, why not. We all loaded in the car and headed to the movies. I am trying so hard to start doing more normal life things again.

Talmage fell asleep not long into the movie. At one point he picked up his head, looked up at me and said, "Jer, if I go to sleep will Thomas have a donut for me when I open my eyes in the morning?" Oh how much I laughed and laughed at him. I may have dozed a little too during the movie. But we had an adventure thanks to Hayden's psychic visions.  Glad he is so much fun.

During the night, I woke up and went to sleep on the couch while the pain subsided. When I came back to get in bed with Thomas, Talmage was in my spot. I climbed in bed and Talmage immediately rolled over to cuddle with me. After cuddling for a while I was tired and just wanted to sleep. I tried moving him and he told me no. I gave up and went back to the couch. After a couple more hours I was going to attempt  bed again. This is what I found. Oh how I love these boys and that they are both such cuddle bugs.

Thomas and I laughed and laughed at both of them cuddled up in the bed. These are the moments that I cherish. It won't be long and I am sure Hayden will stop finding his way into our bed. And although it is quite obnoxious while I am sleeping, I love it when I am awake. I love these boys. They make my life wonderful and magical and exciting.

Thank you IPhone

Life via iPhone is a crazy thing. Random moments are captured that would have usually passed with the moment. I love the little things in life. They are the moments that a life is made up of. The ordinary day to day moments that are interrupted with holidays and big events. The little moments, for me, is where the sweet joy of life is captured.

Someday I will look back on this time in my life and be so grateful for all the lessons learned and experiences gained. I will remember the big moments that entailed healing, priesthood blessings, hospital stays, little miracles, tender mercies, love shown, family moments and prayers answered. But because of our little iPhone, I will be able to laugh that a wet rag wrapped on my head kept me from passing out. I look lovely all the time with this beauty on my head but it makes life much more tolerable. And I am positive when I look back on this picture, I will laugh and be grateful that this time in my life has past. Okay, who are we kidding, we are getting a good kick out of this picture now. Life is too serious to be taken seriously.

My sweet little niece Brooklyn had to list her favorite activities of the year for her activity day recognition. Her very favorite activity was Cupcakes for a Cure. Brooklyn and Kiley went door to door selling cupcakes and raising money for my medical bills. She melts my heart. I love her dearly. What a sweet girl to willingly serve me and then to last it as her favorite moment of the year. She is such a precious daughter of God. She has such a deep desire to serve and give and love. She is a sweetheart. I adore her. I love her. I cherish her. I am so grateful that this little sweetheart is apart of my life. I always tell her that she is my girl. If I had been blessed with a daughter, she is exactly the one I would have dreamed of. She is a light and joy. I love you, Missy Brooklyn!

Talmage loves his Papa Thomas. He squeals with excitement each time Thomas walks in the door. The other night, Talmage ran to the freezer, grabbed two ice cream sandwiches, and came and jumped on Thomas' lap. I had to capture the moment. Love their sweet relationship.

Last Friday, Thomas had the day off. For some crazy reason Hayden had school. We decided to let him have a ditch day. He wanted so badly to go have a play day. He wanted to have a normal day like we used to. I was miserable but determined to do something. I dragged myself out of bed, grabbed a hat and got in the car. We went to a new restaurant we hadn't tried before. Hayden's delight was evident when Apple Dumpling Cafe brought out a huge cheeseburger. He grinned ear to ear. He enjoyed every single moment we were at the cafe. I realized how much that meant to him. Us doing something normal, like we used to brought him so much joy. He felt like life was back on track. A huge hamburger, a few French fries and a family eating together, talking and laughing was the best medicine for all of us.

He didn't even care that I came home and fell asleep on the couch right when we got home. Nope. His life was back to normal, if only for an hour, but it was enough. Simple but perfect.

To the makers of the iPhone, thanks for putting on a camera, I'm so glad these sweet and precious moments are captured.

IEP goals achieved

Hayden came bounding in the door, envelope in hand, a huge smile stretched across his face, and enthusiastically lunged at me for me to read the letter addressed, to the parents of Hayden Murphy.

As I asked what the letter contained, he kept saying just read it. As I opened the letter, Hayden beamed with excitement, anxiously telling me what part of it said, quicker than I could read aloud the IEP progress report.

"Hayden has far exceeded all expectations....he is a hard worker.....he gives his all......he does his best to stay on task.......he is polite.......he is kind and caring....he gives his best effort.....he smiles.....he is always happy.....,he sees the positive.....he is such a joy!"

Imagine my astonishment when the actual achievement of the goals themselves, and the effort to accomplish them, far exceeded the glowing personality review in the first paragraph.

Goal after goal was outlined. Laid out clearly as to the expectation, current ability as of August 2012, November 2012, followed by the current progress calculated at the beginning of March. Each goal listed as "Hayden will be able to transition topic, using three transition words, within a three minute conversation, unprompted, four times out of five. Current ability zero out of five. March ability five out of five. 100% accomplished."

Goal after goal, Hayden's outstanding progress was listed. As I read each one, I probably would have broken down in tears out of joy, but Hayden's jumping up and down and huge smile just brought overwhelming joy and gratitude to my heart.

There are definitely areas to work on but I am absolutely in awe at the extreme progress he has made this year. He has given his all. He has tried and tried. I couldn't be more proud. I only ask for his best efforts. I love seeing him gain confidence in himself, tasting the sweet joy of success and learning that he can do hard things.

(He was so excited with his accomplishments and the effort and hard work paying off that he totally forgot about the "reward". What a great place we are at that he no longer needs rewards. He has tasted the sweet joy of accomplishing a goal.)

Monday morning

I have a hard time each and every Monday morning saying goodbye to these two and sending them off to work and school. I love our weekends together. I especially have a hard time letting Hayden go back to school after a long break. Oh how I missed him today.

I was so happy when Jodi called and asked if I wanted to get out of the house and ride to QT. the silence in my house was deafening. I welcomed the reprieve from the quiet of being alone. Better yet, I kidnapped Talmage and we had a movie morning. I loved hearing him play cars at my fee and having him come cuddle up next to me. What a blessing this little guy is in my life.

Donnie came over to chat for a little bit, too, since she knows how hard mornings after breaks are for me. I sure enjoyed the company. I love talking to her about life and figuring out what the Savior wants of our lives, lessons taught and experiences shared. She is such a great friend.

Jodi came back with lunch and we sat and talked. I miss her when I don't see her too often. I miss our chats. I miss sitting and just being with her. I relax. I feel like I contribute back to this world in some small way. Most days it is just two sisters talking and leaning on one another for advice and to listen. I love that she trusts me. I love the incredible person she is. I love watching her become better and more amazing with each passing week and month. One of the greatest blessings in my life is her constant and I changing friendship.

Time passed quickly from when Jodi leaving until I hear my favorite words of the day, "Moooommmmm!" "Mom, where are you?" As Hayden bounds into the house looking for me. For the next twenty minutes or so, I do a lot of nodding and smiling and listening. I love the days when he talks and will share with me. I light up with joy when he lets me into his world.

Today, he was especially excited. His third quarter IEP goal status was in his hand. Wow has my Bubba improved this year. He has tackled hard things and has tasted the sweet reward of hard work. He has mastered nine out of the ten IEP goals set for this year. More than even that, I was so proud of the comments that were written. "Hayden is a joy....he works hard....he tries......he pays attention.....he gives his all....he is enthusiastic about his work....he is kind and positive....he is overall an amazing kid". I know this but it sure is great to hear. Hayden was so so so proud of himself and the skill sets he has mastered. I told him I was happy for the end result but proud of the progress and hard work he put in to achieving his goals.

Homework was done, cheese crisps were made for dinner. Hayden stuck like me to glue. I knew he missed me, as I did him. It was an ordinary day. That was the best part about it. I love ordinary days. For in the ordinary and simple is where true joy and peace are found.

Grandma Day

Hayden was so excited for his Grandma day. He and Grandma Joyce went to the movies, to Village Inn for lunch and then back home to help Grandma assemble her lesson handouts for Relief Society.

Hayden was so excited and called her Friday morning to make sure she remembered. When she asked what he wanted to do, he said he wanted to hear stories about his daddy growing up. He loved listening to her and learning more about his dad growing up, his grandma and grandpa. His dad had a lot of adventures, being born in England and being raised as an Air Force brat.

I love the tender relationship that Hayden has with his Grandma. They have been buds for a lot of years. I am so glad Hayden has her.

It was a great day. Hayden came home out of this world happy and smiling.

Grandma dates are definitely the best!

Adventure time

When Suzi has the boys it is always time for an adventure. She spoils the rotten and plays and plays with them.

With Cooper and Ollie in town, Suzi promised them tons of fun.

Hayden was able to join them on Monday for a day of marathon adventures. First up, Suzi took the boys for laughter and thrilling adventures at Amazing Jakes where they ate pizza, rode bumper cards, played video games, yelled, laughed and ate ice cream until they were sick.

Then they were off to the Lego store. Possibly one of Hayden's favorite places on earth. Of course, in true Suzi fashion, the spoiling continued. What lucky boys! The boys got huge lego sets. Hayden called his dad to tell him he got a set that was expert level for ages 16 and up. Thomas was just elated to have another project to work on. He teased Hayden that he was going to super glue it as he went, to make sure he only had to spend one weekend working on the lego skyscraper. Hayden laughed and giggled that his dad was going to get to help him build Legos. It is something they had done together for years until lately Hayden can build them in no time flat. (I see a Sunday afternoon nap for me while the boys tackle the Legos). All kidding aside, Thomas loves working with Hayden on projects and will have so much fun conquering this with Hayden.

The boys came home exhausted but with humongous smiles on their faces.

No surprise at all when Hayden was fast asleep by 7:30pm. Great day for the boys. I bet an exhausting day for Aunt Suzi! Thanks Suzi! Hayden had a great time!

Yard work

Best part of doing yard work for my Bubba....finding worms.

When Hayden arrived home from scout camp, Thomas was out working in the yard. It was in need of quite a bit of tender loving care. So many plants had died over the winter. The HOA was not happy with our dead plants. Thomas spent most of the day pulling up dead plants and planting lantana into the missing spots. Love lantana... It is inexpensive, has flowers, spreads out quickly and is easy to maintain and hard to kill.

Thomas told Hayden to drop his bags in the garage and he needed his help.

Hayden told us stories while he helped his dad.

I loved watching the two of them in the yard working together, talking, laughing and telling stories. Hayden relayed the events of the weekend while Thomas told Hayden stories of his day at camp. As Thomas told stories, Hayden became more and more excited for upcoming trips and adventures. They collected worms while they worked and laughed as they threw them on one another and relocated them to the uprooted ground that was just replanted.

As they both came in, they were excited for me to go see the yard and the fruits of their labors.

I watched my sweet husband as he worked with Hayden, teaching him, helping him and listening to him. It's these moments that I am reminded at how great my life is. I'm married to a good man that loves me and Hayden and wants to help us. He wanted me to feel good when I lay in the grass or sit on the rocker outside, seeing that the yard is maintained and beautiful flowers beautify our yard. He loves Hayden and is willing to take the time to help him learn important skills. He is willing to work hard for our family. What a gift to me and a great example to Hayden.

He survived... And loved it

Hayden came home Saturday afternoon with a huge grin on his face and stories to tell.

*rock climbing
*falling down a cliff
*sleeping in his tent by himself
*playing capture the flag
*service project - cleaning up trash
*Israelite brown shirt
*new friends
*more self confidence
*fireside around the campfire
*spirit during campfire
*help putting up his tent
*pancakes for breakfast
*great leaders
*laughing and playing
*being absolutely filthy dirty

Hayden has smiled big while talking about his camp out. He loved the freedom and opportunity that scouts provided. His self confidence grew. He learned he could conquer fears and do hard things.

I was so very proud of him.

So many leaders commented on how great Hayden was, how much he was always smiling, his great attitude, his willingness to try hard, and the great attributes he has including: kindness, great attitude, helpful and caring.

Whew! I am so happy that it went well. I am so grateful for incredible leaders that sacrifice their time and talents for my son. I'm so happy that Hayden had his Father in Heaven's help to conquer his fears and have a great time.

I breathed a huge sigh of relief when he was home and safely back in my arms. But, I am so happy he loved scouting and he will look forward to upcoming outings and enjoy the time with his friends at scouts. It couldn't have turned out any better.

Now, I just need to learn to let go a little more. He really is growing up.

First Scout Campout

I cannot believe that Hayden headed out for his first scout camp out early this morning.

He wasn't sure last night if he was ready to go. But as we packed his backpack, pulled out the tent, sleeping bag, filled his camelpack with water, and put treats in for all the boys, the smile across his faced stretched wider with excitement and anticipation.

We are in such a great ward. The leaders that called to make sure Hayden was going to go on the campout were too numerous to list. His scout leaders called, the young men's leaders, the bishopric and other parents. Hayden is very loved in this ward. He has so many people that genuinely care about him.

I was doing all I could not to let me hesitation show through. I have all the confidence in the world in Hayden. I know he has the power to do anything he sets his mind to. I just am not ready to let him grow up. I know that this is the start of the journey to his mission. My job from here on out is to prepare him to go out into the world, without me.

I thought long and hard to what it must have been like for our Father in Heaven to let us go. He made sure we had everything we needed for our journey here to earth, just like I did with Hayden. I am sure that before I left that he sat and counciled with me like I did with Hayden before he walked out the door. I reminded him of his tasks and assured him he had everything needed to enjoy and conquer his journey. I handed Hayden his scriptures, told him to pray if he felt lonely and assured him that the Holy Ghost was with him. 

Hayden wanted me to ride with Thomas to drop him off this morning. When we arrived at Brother Hamblin's house, Rylan was already there. Hayden jumped out of the car and was ready to go. He hugged me but more for my sake. He was off. Ready for an adventure. Ready to spread his wings and fly.

As Thomas drove me home, I said a prayer for my sweet boy. I want him to have fun. I want him to find joy in his adventures. I also want him to know that he is not alone. His Father in Heaven is near. He sends the Holy Ghost to comfort him.

As I sat today thinking of what Hayden must be doing, I wondered what those last pieces of information that our Father told me before I left his side. He must of reminded me that I am His. I am his daughter. Assured me that he is always as close as a prayer.

I am praying that he has a great time. He is taking his first steps towards earning his eagle. It is a long journey but as all journeys, it starts with a single step. Hayden took the first step, with a huge smile on his face, ready to conquer the world. As his mom, I couldn't be more proud. As I knelt down when I got home, I was reassured that my Father in Heaven feels the same. He smiles at me as I take my first step down the new path of helping Hayden find independence from me and more dependence of the Savior.

Scripture Study

Hayden has learned to receive answers to his prayers, just like his momma. If he is looking for an answer, he says a quick prayer and then holds the scriptures and lets them fall open to a page. He then starts reading until he finds an answer to his prayer.

It works! I wasn't able to communicate this way for answers until I was on my mission. Hayden has it pretty much mastered at 11.

Mormon 8:21 Behold, I say unto you that whoso believeth in Christ, doubting nothing, whatsoever he shall ask the Father in the name of Christ it shall be granted him; and this promise is unto all, even unto the ends of the earth.

As we flipped open the scripture, this is the first scripture we read. I asked Hayden what he thought his Father in Heaven was trying to say to him. He proceeded to go through the scripture and rely the feeling of his tender little heart. I expressed his love for our Savior. He expressed his belief that the Savior can do all things. He expressed his deepest fears, desires, hopes and beliefs. It was such a tender moment.

Then, with wisdom beyond is years, he connected this scripture with the events in our lives. Hayden began expressing miracles, linking them with events in our lives and talking of how those related with miracles in the scriptures.

I love my boy so much. I am in awe of his understanding of the scriptures, his love for our Savior and how he has learned to listen and be taught by the Spirit.

After reading the scriptures, listening to Hayden's sweet testimony and his understanding of the scriptures and his Savior's love for him, I relaxed. Hayden may find himself in situations where he is scared, frightened or lacking the answers. However, I know he is armed with the understanding that he is not alone, he knows where to find the answers and knows that help is only a prayer away.

Spring break

Half way in to spring break and I am loving every minute of it. I love having my boy home with me every day.

I love relaxing mornings in pj's, watching cartoons and eating cereal. I love sitting and talking with Hayden, playing IPad games, board games, watching netflix, looking for pineapples in past Psych episodes, the precious sound of Hayden's laughter, building Legos, cousins, tickle wars with Thomas and Hayden and no homework!

As I sat with Hayden yesterday, we played several board games and then I was exhausted. My cute son made me a bed on the floor of his man cave. He wanted me to be by him, even though I was sleeping. I love how thoughtful and caring and tender he is becoming.

I am so glad that Spring break is two weeks. I'm so grateful I get another week with my sweet boy, all to myself. Sure, friends will come and go, but I don't have to rush him out the door and have him come home to activities and piles of homework.

Usually I am working while he is on breaks. I am soaking in, relishing in each day and enjoying each and every moment that I get to sit and just be here with him.

I love when my cute nieces and nephews come play, too. I love them and love the great relationships he is building. I loved sneaking down the hallway and just eavesdropping on their cute little conversations.

Life is so good. It is so sweet. I am so thankful I am here to be enjoying these precious and tender moments.