1) massive stroke that severed the frontal lobe causing huge disconnect. Along with severe cognitive issues and physical issues. My spelling is backwards. My tripping and falling has increased dramatically.
2) severe chemo toxicity poisoning. I am having severe issues. Which has caused kidney and liver failure and anemia and so much more.
I'm in trouble. My body is shutting down. They don't know if this is going to be the big thing that takes me out. I'm holding on. I am trying to hold on. I am fighting. I am trying to to be strong.
I see my Savior's hand in my life. He saved my life. He protected me. I am so grateful. He allowed me more time with those I love. He gave me more time. More of everything.
I am so grateful for Him.
Hayden asked Why did the Saviorlet you get so bad? We explained that we wouldn't have known if it hadn't got so bad that we had to ask the doctor. And without asking, I could have gotten work. Without me being so bad, our Savior would have had to protect me every day from here on out. Once we figured it out, the intensity eased. Our savior knew then that I was safe. He let it get so bad, so I could get help. I am so grateful that Hayden asked why? Because then we could teach him what the Savior allows us to experience such heartache and hurt. Because the heartache takes us to a better place.
Our Savior has protected me and allowed me just enough heartache to get help. It was awful. I cried and cried for weeks. I didn't think I would survive. It was heartbreaking. It was emotionally exhausting. It caused me to question everything. He allowed me to experience heartbreaking sorrow and emotional torment. But that caused me to call doctors. It caused me to seek help. It brought me even more often to my knees.
I grateful for my Savior. He kept me alive during my massive stroke. He kept the trauma as ,I I,so as possible.
I'm still fighting for my life. I'm fighting to live.
Yet I know without my Savior, I wouldn't be here. I survived another stroke. I'm so grateful.
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